Crossing the finish line

Most of the races we remember have triumphal endings. The finishers propel themselves through the tape in cadence with exuberant cheers and applause of onlookers.  It seems as though somewhere toward the end of the race, they gathered up what remaining strength they had left to end the race strong.

Other finishers stagger across the finish line looking blearily around for faces they recognize, water, and a place to collapse and rest their weary legs. Some runners even cross the finish line only to double over and immediately begin to vomit all over the track.

Our official finish to the paperwork side of our adoption seemed to be a lot more like that of the latter runners.

This past Monday, Luke and I traveled with Boaz up to Chicago to appear in court for the final paperwork portion of this adoption.

We had researched several adoption attorneys in our area and ended up deciding the most financially conservative decision would be to go up to Cook County where a lovely woman name Denise Patton advocates on behalf of adoptive families.

Denise is an attorney with 20 years of experience in adoptions; and as an adoptive mother herself, has the compassion and understanding to simplify what could have been a fairly complicated adoption process in the State of Illinois.

Our adoption agency doesn't consider the adoption finalized until we have we re-adopted Boaz in our home state; ensuring he has Illinois birth certificate, final adoption decree, and other paperwork that makes his life much more seamless in the future.

We have been going so strong for so long during this massive paperwork process... traveled over three weeks in Korea between August and September... and now a trip up to Chicago... I think it's finally starting to catch up with us. In short, we grown-ups are pretty exhausted! I feel like we staggered over the finish line on Monday.

It was a fairly breezy drive up to the Daley Government Center.  We arrived in time to check out a donut shop across the street and pick up a box for the other children who were enjoying the day at home with Grammy.

Boaz did great in the adoption playroom.  We were number 5 on the court call,  so waited our turn.  It was fun to watch a particularity exuberant group who came to support the adoption of a 3 year old little girl.  The shining eyes and smiling faces of the well wishers gathered there spoke volumes about the value of each little life.

It's so important to embrace life beyond voting Pro-Life in the ballot box...  To truly be "Pro-Life" is to support and advocate on behalf of the least of these little ones after their mamas have chosen to carry them full-term.

We joyfully stood before the judge when our names were called and "re-adopted" Boaz into our family under the State of Illinois law.  Boaz got to choose a Beanie Baby stuffed animal from a basket and a baby - safe sucker to eat.

We were impressed by the smooth experience and can't recommend Denise highly enough for her professionalism and personality.

After a few more fun photos, we followed her down to the County Clerk's office and waited a few minutes for our judge sealed adoption decree.

It was honestly such a smooth day,  that I was silently pretty proud of ourselves.  I packed Bo warmly in my Onya child carrier ♡ and he was content even in chilly windblown downtown Chicago. Little did I know the wheels were about to fall off this happy train.

Luke had scoped out the area online beforehand and surprised me by walking us around the corner from the Goodman Theater to a nice Italian restaurant (he knows those are a favorite of mine!)

After we were seated and Boaz was happily eating cheerios and sipping a bottle of formula, Luke needed to go move our truck. We'd timed out the $14 parking spot he'd booked online.

No worries.  I ordered our delicious lunch and settled in for the celebration of adoption paperwork finale!!

Then the unthinkable happened.  A parent's public scrutiny nightmare.

Bo must've swallowed the water I was spoon-feeding him wrong: he started to choke and then threw up. Not once.  Not twice. Three times.

There were a few other tables filled with groups enjoying conversation and glasses of wine in the 3 o'clock hour. To my knowledge, amazingly, they appeared not to even notice.

I patted Bo's back, loosely holding a brilliantly white cloth napkin in front of his mouth, rolling it up as he filled it. Poor little guy lost it all.  I grabbed cloth napkins, even snapping the napkin out from under the bread in the basket like a magician. I hissed at Luke to start handing me diaper wipes.

He had been sitting across the table staring in horror. It was like a train wreck: you couldn't look away but were completely helpless to stop the damage.

I took Bo to the ladies room to clean up, and couldn't help but laugh when a calm and balmy French love song greeted my ears.  It was a gorgeous bathroom with marble counters and fine furnishings. As I wiped down my sweet little boy, who was now content and grinning at me, I was thinking,  "Of course! This day was definitely going too good to be true!"

Isn't that how it goes sometimes?? There I was, floating along on a cloud, feeling a little nostalgic like a roaring 20s celebrity in a beautiful restaurant with my best friend and young son... who had just thrown up all over the experience.

Needless to say we hastily finished our late  lunch and made a quick exit; Luke lamenting his $31 parking fee after moving the truck, and then of course we then hit rush hour traffic.

Bo screamed half the way home because he hated being in the carseat... worked himself up so much that he threw up again... all over his carseat... and so ended our day in Chicago! And our new life with Boaz officially began.

You can bet as we were driving home with a screaming toddler covered in his own spit-up on a congested highway, taking three hours on a trip that should take two, we grumbled about the difficulties of adoption.

It isn't always pretty. It isn't always fun. In fact it can be downright messy! When you choose the hard and sacrifice so much, it's tempting to question why God allows such inconveniences and frustrations on days when we should feel joy and elation!

It reminded me very much of our dear friends Bob and Kristi who gave up all their worldly possessions, leaving family and friends and chose the hard for the sake of bringing Christ's love to the hurting people of South Sudan.

While their excitement and exuberance propelled them across the ocean, upon arrival Bob began to suffer with an unexplained illness: severe fatigue and high fevers that doctors could not explain (this later turned out to be a severe case of Mono).

During those times when Bob felt deflated and even depressed on the mission field, he shared how God walked with them through the wilderness of this experience that had such a joyful beginning and descended quickly into confusion, frustration, and pain.

My friend Marianne wisely said "discouragement must be one of Satan's favorite tools against Christians."

We start out so strong! We feel so on-fire for the Lord's will for our lives as we read the Word. We begin to walk out His precepts and then suddenly we're sidelined by setbacks! Isn't everything supposed to go smooth when we're following His plan?!

It's easy in these moments to become self-centered and feel sorry for ourselves. But praise God we look back and see His fingerprints over every step of the way!
He hasn't abandoned us or the mission He has us on. In the rough moments He literally carries us because we are too weak to continue on in our own strength!

We've crossed the finish line of the official adoption and have begun a new race of adoptive parenting.

It is with great joy but utter humbleness that we continue this journey; knowing that in our weakness, our strength is perfect when we rely on His strength to finish well!